Day One: Fractions of Food

 

Day One: Fractions of Food

Starting weight: Three Hundred and Twenty One Pounds of fluffy cavenertastic old guy. 

I took my first dose at 5:00 AM and immediately discovered the greatest challenge of modern medicine:

Waiting 1800 seconds untill I consume any coffee. Today it was real Kona (not a blasted blend) coffee, which made those seconds seemed to snear at me oppressively from nowhere and everywhere in the predawn thickness of our dark bedroom. 

I survived, obviously, and by 6:45, my stomach had begun making observations of its own. Not pain. Not nausea. More like my digestive tract had received a memo from management and was quietly reviewing the new policy just prior to ignoring it off-handedly.

On most 'normal' days, somewhere around halfway to work, my internal hunger alarm goes off. Every day. Like clockwork, I think of a greasy hot, instant something to shove in my face and I will admit, it's almost always a keto-throwback move, like the heavy cream I still use in my coffee. During that period of my life, I observed that when most folk say they want something 'meaty' what they're really after is fat, because its a much more efficient fuel, but I digress.

Yes, coffee sounded good, but when does it not? But a bite to eat, not so much.

"Huh... interesting", but not unheard of, I suppose. 

Mid-morning I encountered a box of fig bars in the break room, the blueberry and raspberry lot that you get at that one huge warehouse place everyone loves. You know, the ones so high in fiber that taking your next dump feels more like someone is yanking a rope out of you. Yeah...

Now, I genuinely like these things. They obey what I consider the 'hierarchy of fruit' and one of those snacks that quietly disappear if left unattended. I took a bite, with not particular motivation behind it.

One.

That was enough and the rest of it sat on my desk for the remainder of the shift.

Later, I found myself staring at a Carl's Jr. menu. Normally, fast food menus are designed to trigger some primitive part of the human brain. Burgers. Fries. Onion rings. Milkshakes. The usual tribal offerings.

Today it had all the emotional appeal of a software licensing agreement and my inner monologue agreed with my wife's diagnosis that the science (it's only art in the abstract sense) of advertising is a genuine negative influence on us all.

I was hungry, mind you. The meat-a-saur was awake and filing formal complaints with management. But I didn't want gummy bears. I didn't want fries. I didn't want onion rings.

I wanted beef. So I ordered a lettuce-wrapped Angus burger with cheese, onions and mustard.

No bun, no ketchup, no pickle & no time to waste on testing the outcome. 

I ate most of it. 7/8ths of it of I'm shooting form the hip and not because I was trying to be disciplined. Not because I was counting calories. Not because I was making a heroic sacrifice for the future of mankind.

I just didn't want any more. The best way I can describe the feeling is this:

It felt like Thanksgiving without the nappy-silly-happy sensations. 

Not stuffed.

Not miserable.

Just... done.

And the idea of ordering onion rings afterward seemed absurd.

By dinner time I wasn't ravenous. I cooked for my wife and daughter, sipped ice water and got ready to see what day two will bring, but before long indulged in five dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets and made silly faces at my grandson.

Five. That was dinner.

And by 7:10 PM I was sitting with another glass of ice water and absolutely no desire to eat anything else.

I'm self-aware enough to know that one day is neither evidence nor a trend. Bodies are noisy. Water weight lies. Placebos exist. I've spent enough years in this one to know better than to declare victory after a single sunrise.

But I also know myself.

And today, for the first time in a very long time, food stopped negotiating.

We'll see what tomorrow has to say.

-ZB

** The preceding words are a record of my personal journey and are not intended to replace or circumvent any recommend guidance provided by your health care provider. Before starting any life changing endeavor, such as a diet and/or exercise regimen, please start by having an honest conversation with your doctor. Links and references to products and services are unaffiliated - I don't make a dime from this blog. Don't be stupid - always be over prepared and never hike or cave alone. Oh and please don't ask for cave locations. Believe me, if I can find them, so can you. © 2026 by me, not you and not them**